I know you all think I have been quite the teacher-blogger-slacker-loser since June. And you’d be correct. I have reverted back to a form, a self, pre-teacher days, and pretended like the summer actually did belong to me. I know the salary for a teacher is over a 10-month time frame, so the paycheck that came the end of July and will come the last day of August are for days I’ve already worked. (And if you know how lousy I am at budgeting, you’ll know that safety-net, those ‘nanny state’ controls are a godsend for me.) But our educational system is a hungry beast, perhaps who only hibernates in the summer sun, sleeping a restive, dreamless sleep.
Do I feel rested now? Yes, but only because I managed to push, push, push so many concerns to the corner. That edge of the metaphorical rug has so much grit swept under it, it looks as if it has a body underneath. I don’t want to worry anymore. I just don’t. But, I am someone who is used to taking the wheel, navigating the seas, charging ahead, and if I leave all of the decisions to others, I will feel superfluous.
Maybe I already do.
I have more to say, but am weighing out the words so the positive ones outnumber and negatives ones.
And I have a little more time. Shhh! Don’t wake it up.